Things not to do in Vegas.

If the phrase, “what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas” is true, then consider this list of things not to do while you’re there:

Discover any scientific breakthroughs (or any type of breakthrough, for that matter).

Inherit any type of windfall, be it property, monetary or otherwise.

Adopt (human or alien surrogate).

Invent anything revolutionary (leave notebooks at home). Menial inventions are okay.

Lose teeth.